Inspiration And Information

~~~~~~~~~~   A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.  The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'. The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?' The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.' The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what God looks like' ...

KIDS IN CHURCH. 3-year-old Reese : ' Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen. '  A little boy was overheard praying:  ' Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it.  I'm having a real good time like I am. '    After the christening of his baby brother in church,  Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.  His father asked him three times what was wrong.  Finally, the boy replied,  ' That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home,  and I wanted to stay with you guy s. ' One particular four-year-old prayed,  ' And forgive us our trash baskets  as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets. '  A Sunday school teac...

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A  JOB WELL DONE  . "If you're going to kill each other, do  it outside.. I just finished cleaning."  My mother taught me RELIGION . "You better pray that will come out of the carpet.."  My mother taught me about TIME  TRAVEL . "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock  you into the middle of next week!"  My mother taught me LOGIC . "  Because I said so, that's why."    My mother taught me MORE LOGIC  . "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going  to the store with me.."  My  mother taught me FORESIGHT . "Make sure you wear clean  underwear, in case you're in an accident."    My mother taught me IRONY . "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." My Mother taught me about the  science of OSMOSIS  .  "Shut your mouth and eat your  supper."  M...